搜狗做题网请问我的这一段英文语法上有没有什么错误?
来源：学生作业帮 编辑：搜狗做题网作业帮 分类：英语作业 时间：2024/06/01 11:22:29
请问我的这一段英文语法上有没有什么错误?
Mr.law,
Many thanks for your reply and appreciation.I have received your e-mail for 3 days,I tried to call your Hong Kong cell phone twice but could not contact with you.I want to know when will be the suitable time I arrive to shenzhen to join your team.And I don’t have any special demands on my salary package,I think that is not a big problem.May you tell me how i can contact with you for more discussion?
Best regards,
respectfully yours,
Hill
以上的邮件是我回复给我一个应聘公司的老板,一直都没他的回复,我估计是不是语法出了问题让他失望了.所以想请问大家帮我分析一下看看我的语法是不是有什么地方不对的,如果有,麻烦高手给我详细指出来并做改正.
Mr.law,
Many thanks for your reply and appreciation.I have received your e-mail for 3 days,I tried to call your Hong Kong cell phone twice but could not contact with you.I want to know when will be the suitable time I arrive to shenzhen to join your team.And I don’t have any special demands on my salary package,I think that is not a big problem.May you tell me how i can contact with you for more discussion?
Best regards,
respectfully yours,
Hill
以上的邮件是我回复给我一个应聘公司的老板,一直都没他的回复,我估计是不是语法出了问题让他失望了.所以想请问大家帮我分析一下看看我的语法是不是有什么地方不对的,如果有,麻烦高手给我详细指出来并做改正.
怎么说呢?其实你的语法倒没有多大的问题,小问题倒是有,只是我觉得最大的问题是你犯了找工作之大忌.让我来具体的分析一下.
1.首先,抬头.Mr.Law.你做为一个陌生人,怎么敢赶直接直呼其姓呢?他和你很熟吗?为什么不加Dear 千万不要忽视这一点.
2."I have received your e-mail for 3 days." Receive是瞬间动词,不能写have received.应该写 I received your e-mail 3 days ago.或,It has been 3 days since I received your e-mail.
3."I tried to call your Hong Kong cell phone twice but could not contact with you."
你这个contact with,用得不对.我想你是说没取得联系.没有得联系应该说 but could not connect with you.
4."I want to know when will be the suitable time I arrive to shenzhen to join your team."
Mr.law根本就没有答应你给你机会,你为什么就直接问什么时候去深圳呢?你至少应该问一下,是否有机会之类的话.你说呢?
5."And I don’t have any special demands on my salary package"
这句话很可怕.什么叫没有什么特别要求.没有特别要求的人,招聘人员都会在心里找一个问号?你应该提出你的要求.要不然别人会认为你很随便,没有主见.
他这次不给你回信,也可能是太忙了.
我就这么多见解了.
1.首先,抬头.Mr.Law.你做为一个陌生人,怎么敢赶直接直呼其姓呢?他和你很熟吗?为什么不加Dear 千万不要忽视这一点.
2."I have received your e-mail for 3 days." Receive是瞬间动词,不能写have received.应该写 I received your e-mail 3 days ago.或,It has been 3 days since I received your e-mail.
3."I tried to call your Hong Kong cell phone twice but could not contact with you."
你这个contact with,用得不对.我想你是说没取得联系.没有得联系应该说 but could not connect with you.
4."I want to know when will be the suitable time I arrive to shenzhen to join your team."
Mr.law根本就没有答应你给你机会,你为什么就直接问什么时候去深圳呢?你至少应该问一下,是否有机会之类的话.你说呢?
5."And I don’t have any special demands on my salary package"
这句话很可怕.什么叫没有什么特别要求.没有特别要求的人,招聘人员都会在心里找一个问号?你应该提出你的要求.要不然别人会认为你很随便,没有主见.
他这次不给你回信,也可能是太忙了.
我就这么多见解了.