搜狗做题网雅思小作文写作求评个大概分
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雅思小作文写作求评个大概分
题目是剑6第2套关于英国各个交通方式变化的,规定时间做完,（19分钟）147字,求个大概分,谢~~~
The table illustrates the statistics about changesin distance of varies of transportation had travelled from the period of timebetween 1985 and 2000 in England.
In general, the total distance per personper year climbed from 4740 to 6475 and almost all modes of travel experiencedan increase, except for walking, Bicycle and Local Bus, which witnessed anopposite trend in travelled distance.
Taxi, the least popular form of transportin 1985, almost tripled the figure and reached 42 miles per person per year. Besides,Car remained the top of the statistics by rose over 1500 miles and hit 4806miles at the beginning of 21st century.
By comparison, Bicycle dropped from 51 to41 and became the least popular transportation in 2000 when walking and localbus also went through a decrease.
Overall, all modes of travel changeddifferently from 1985 to 2000.
题目是剑6第2套关于英国各个交通方式变化的,规定时间做完,（19分钟）147字,求个大概分,谢~~~
The table illustrates the statistics about changesin distance of varies of transportation had travelled from the period of timebetween 1985 and 2000 in England.
In general, the total distance per personper year climbed from 4740 to 6475 and almost all modes of travel experiencedan increase, except for walking, Bicycle and Local Bus, which witnessed anopposite trend in travelled distance.
Taxi, the least popular form of transportin 1985, almost tripled the figure and reached 42 miles per person per year. Besides,Car remained the top of the statistics by rose over 1500 miles and hit 4806miles at the beginning of 21st century.
By comparison, Bicycle dropped from 51 to41 and became the least popular transportation in 2000 when walking and localbus also went through a decrease.
Overall, all modes of travel changeddifferently from 1985 to 2000.
首段点评：写得过于啰嗦 例如 from the period of time between 1985 and 2000 in England
并且出现了双谓语的错误 The table illustrates the statistics about .had travelled .
二段点评：4740 to 6475 没有单位 而且这句话的描述对象并不是total distance而是average distance travelled per person per year by all modes of travel 所有交通方式的平均距离
尽管后半句提到了all modes 但是却自作主张的把all modes 这组整体数据的上升趋势给拆分了
几个‘例外’（其实这都是后面具体描述时候才要写到的 即使当表格是动态的 也不能把它完全当做线状图来完全机械照搬）
三段点评：taxi 的描述不完整 没有1985年的数据 最小值是重要信息 数据必然不能省略!
almost tripped 很可能会让考官感到困惑 13X3=39 almost 就是不到39 .
42miles 对应的时间点2000也尽量不要省略.Besides,不如 However,最小、最大之间是一种强转折的关系,不是简简单单的并列关系.
综合评分 6分（仅供参考）.
并且出现了双谓语的错误 The table illustrates the statistics about .had travelled .
二段点评：4740 to 6475 没有单位 而且这句话的描述对象并不是total distance而是average distance travelled per person per year by all modes of travel 所有交通方式的平均距离
尽管后半句提到了all modes 但是却自作主张的把all modes 这组整体数据的上升趋势给拆分了
几个‘例外’（其实这都是后面具体描述时候才要写到的 即使当表格是动态的 也不能把它完全当做线状图来完全机械照搬）
三段点评：taxi 的描述不完整 没有1985年的数据 最小值是重要信息 数据必然不能省略!
almost tripped 很可能会让考官感到困惑 13X3=39 almost 就是不到39 .
42miles 对应的时间点2000也尽量不要省略.Besides,不如 However,最小、最大之间是一种强转折的关系,不是简简单单的并列关系.
综合评分 6分（仅供参考）.