搜狗做题网英文好的帮我修改这篇短文的文法 修改成功给20分
来源：学生作业帮 编辑：搜狗做题网作业帮 分类：英语作业 时间：2024/04/30 01:15:35
英文好的帮我修改这篇短文的文法 修改成功给20分
The picture was taken 3 years ago,while I was still in middle school.I was in the band and we performed our last show in that school before the school year was end.The day after the show,band teacher brought us to Great America.Everyone was delightful about going on the roller coasters and Ferris Wheel.
On that day,my friends and I went on the Ferris Wheel,the photo showed and the way I sat seems like I was looking and interesting about the view outside.I even show “ya” with my hands while I was taking the picture.
I have acrophobia,need to avoid going on some high and scary Motor-driven games.All my friends were laughing at my timidity.They told me the way to be brave was go on a roller coaster and take a ride.We finally decided to go on the Ferris Wheel,but it was still so scary for me,I couldn’t even look down or look outside.Most of the time,my eyes remain closed.The only time I opened my eyes were the time they asked me to take a picture for memory.
Photos can only record moments,but the story behind,we don’t know.In real life,people lie to people.Everybody has experiences of lying to someone.We cheat on each other occasionally.However,some people are lying with a good intention,they are not try to offend or harm anyone.Same with the photos,all we want is to save the beautiful moments for souvenir.
有人说这篇文章有点文法问题 什么过去式 现在式之类的 急用啊
The picture was taken 3 years ago,while I was still in middle school.I was in the band and we performed our last show in that school before the school year was end.The day after the show,band teacher brought us to Great America.Everyone was delightful about going on the roller coasters and Ferris Wheel.
On that day,my friends and I went on the Ferris Wheel,the photo showed and the way I sat seems like I was looking and interesting about the view outside.I even show “ya” with my hands while I was taking the picture.
I have acrophobia,need to avoid going on some high and scary Motor-driven games.All my friends were laughing at my timidity.They told me the way to be brave was go on a roller coaster and take a ride.We finally decided to go on the Ferris Wheel,but it was still so scary for me,I couldn’t even look down or look outside.Most of the time,my eyes remain closed.The only time I opened my eyes were the time they asked me to take a picture for memory.
Photos can only record moments,but the story behind,we don’t know.In real life,people lie to people.Everybody has experiences of lying to someone.We cheat on each other occasionally.However,some people are lying with a good intention,they are not try to offend or harm anyone.Same with the photos,all we want is to save the beautiful moments for souvenir.
有人说这篇文章有点文法问题 什么过去式 现在式之类的 急用啊
The picture was taken 3 years ago,when I
改成了when,while总在这里不太恰当（高中知识点）
was still in the middle school.I was in
加了冠词the
a band and we performed our last show in
band前文没有提到,所以不能the特指
that school before the school year ended.
end没有形容词词性哦……
The day after the show,the band teacher
特指老师～所以加the
brought us to the Great America.Everyone
加了the...不过great america是哪?美国的话,是the USA哦
was delightful about going on the roller coasters and Ferris Wheel.
On that day,my friends and I went on the Ferris Wheel as the photo showed and the
句子里没有连词,我给改成定语从句了
way I sat seems like I was looking at and interested in the view outside.I even
上两行改3处,be interested in,look at sth
showed “ya” with my hands when I was had taken the picture of.
这句错的蛮～改动稍大了些,原意没变
I have acrophobia,and need to avoid going
少连词
to some high and scary Motor-driven games.
应该是go to games.
All my friends laughed at my timidity.They
没必要用过去进行时,而且不太恰当
told me the way to be brave was go on a roller coaster and take a ride.We finally decided to go on the Ferris Wheel,but it was still so scary for me,I couldn’t even look down or look outside.Most of the time,my eyes remained closed.The only time I
过去时态
opened my eyes were when they asked me to
再用time有点儿重复,用when引导的表语从句
take a picture for memory.
Photos can only record moments,but we don’t know what is behind the story.
楼主原话说的太……中国英语了……
In real life,people lie to each other.
people to people也太中国英语了～
Everybody has experiences of lying to someone.We cheat on each other
（为了避免与刚那句重复,可以把each other改成one another,意思不变）
occasionally.However,some people lie with
不应该用进行时～一般是就对了
a good intention,they don't try to offend
同理
or harm anyone.Same with the photos,all we want is to save the beautiful moments for some kind of souvenir.
纪念品前面要加东西修饰的,我不想用a,所以给楼主改成了这样,翻译的话,就是……某种意义上的纪念品
………………总的来说,错的是蛮多的哦^^加油
改成了when,while总在这里不太恰当（高中知识点）
was still in the middle school.I was in
加了冠词the
a band and we performed our last show in
band前文没有提到,所以不能the特指
that school before the school year ended.
end没有形容词词性哦……
The day after the show,the band teacher
特指老师～所以加the
brought us to the Great America.Everyone
加了the...不过great america是哪?美国的话,是the USA哦
was delightful about going on the roller coasters and Ferris Wheel.
On that day,my friends and I went on the Ferris Wheel as the photo showed and the
句子里没有连词,我给改成定语从句了
way I sat seems like I was looking at and interested in the view outside.I even
上两行改3处,be interested in,look at sth
showed “ya” with my hands when I was had taken the picture of.
这句错的蛮～改动稍大了些,原意没变
I have acrophobia,and need to avoid going
少连词
to some high and scary Motor-driven games.
应该是go to games.
All my friends laughed at my timidity.They
没必要用过去进行时,而且不太恰当
told me the way to be brave was go on a roller coaster and take a ride.We finally decided to go on the Ferris Wheel,but it was still so scary for me,I couldn’t even look down or look outside.Most of the time,my eyes remained closed.The only time I
过去时态
opened my eyes were when they asked me to
再用time有点儿重复,用when引导的表语从句
take a picture for memory.
Photos can only record moments,but we don’t know what is behind the story.
楼主原话说的太……中国英语了……
In real life,people lie to each other.
people to people也太中国英语了～
Everybody has experiences of lying to someone.We cheat on each other
（为了避免与刚那句重复,可以把each other改成one another,意思不变）
occasionally.However,some people lie with
不应该用进行时～一般是就对了
a good intention,they don't try to offend
同理
or harm anyone.Same with the photos,all we want is to save the beautiful moments for some kind of souvenir.
纪念品前面要加东西修饰的,我不想用a,所以给楼主改成了这样,翻译的话,就是……某种意义上的纪念品
………………总的来说,错的是蛮多的哦^^加油